who would know i'd end up here again this year.

i thought i was happy enough, but i guess i was wrong.

can i re-emphasise the things that i hate most:
1. being cheated
2. being accused

i hate the feeling i get when things like these happen. i thought i wouldnt have to go through all the pain and uncertainty again. but boy i was wrong.

they were right, things changed. they changed. he changed.

all the excuses, all the accusations, all the double standards.
they are starting to get me down. it sucks big time. i feel so worn out.

i thought it was exams pulling my mood down, but i suppose not. i think i'm tired of worrying. i'm tired of living up to expectations. and i'm tired of feeling cheated and accused.

i cry, not because i am upset.
most of the time, i cry because i am indignant. or that i am just too fucking pissed to utter a word anymore. it is supposed to be an act of protest, not a sign of weakness. my glands are hyperactive, that i admit. but i can't help it can i? WHO THE FUCK WANTS TO BE SEEN CRYING.
but it seems like you think otherwise. stop trying to stop me from crying. don't you know that you end up making me cry harder? AND I DONT CRY TO ATTRACT ATTENTION. i just need to get all those horrid emotions out.

and it seems like you are more interested in helping other people than salvaging your own.

i know right, things aren't as perfect as they seem.